TF2-991

Item ID: 991

Class: Mercenary 

Containment Protocols: TF2-991 is to be held in a standard humanoid containment dorm in Site-999. The dorm is to hold all of TF2-991's personal items (including its expansive armory), with an anomalous kill switch to render its weaponry and implants useless available to the site director.

Description: 

TF2-991 is a sapient humanoid resembling a member of the Cephaneco family. Most of TF2-991's body has been outfitted with cybernetic modifications, the most notable of the bulky retinal and breathing/oxygen filtering implants built into its head. It wields what appears to be a gold-plated frying pan (determined to be made out of a metal not naturally occurring on Earth according to chemical analysis), which TF2-991 claims to have won in a game of "pazaak".

TF2-991 claims to be a middle aged "jesorpaslarian", a species from the planet of Jesorp according to TF2-991. It is a member of the extragalactic "bounty hunting guild" known as the Jiéhé.

Despite being among the apparent "best bounty hunters this side of the Magellanic Clouds", it is arguably very incompetent at its work. Laughably incompetent, actually. For example, it is prone to having its implants malfunction and having its vehicles crash, enough for these to be an actual statistic likelihood.

Strangely, this "bad luck" seemingly assists TF2-991 more often than not. On one occasion, when TF2-991's retinal implant implant suddenly lost power, it stumbled blindly forward and accidentally pushed its target over a catwalk and into a vat of molten australium.

As TF2-991 claims that none of this is done on purpose as some sort of alien combat technique and that it has always been "unlucky-lucky", along with the frequency of these events according to statistical studies, it has been determined that this is likely a latent anomalous ability.

TF2-991 does not show any aversion towards being contained, as long it is paid more than the Jiéhé to do so. As such, TF2-991 is occasionally allowed to contain other anomalies and assassinate targets in exchange for human currency, considering its containment dorm as its "base of operations".

Acquisition Log

TF2-991 was discovered when Tactical Mobile Squad Psi-7 "Combine Harvesters" were deployed to an abandoned Aperture Science facility in ████████, █████, which was the ground zero of a massive portal storm at the time. TF2-991 was found in its crashed "Messier-class bounty freighter", and when approached, killed several Psi-7 members on accident when attempting to escape with its ship - turning on its ion thrusters and vaporizing them.